Male Gamedev Logs Into Twitter: Wow. You women sure do have to put up with a lot of crap. I don’t know how you manage.
Female Gamedev: I manage crap with a shovel, same as everyone else.
Male Gamedev: Yeah, I guess so. Sure is a lot of it! Oh well, guess I better get back to work making my art and building my career and my network of support, since there isn’t a mountain of crap in MY way. Good luck with that mountain of crap that you get for being born female! I *REALLY* don’t know how you manage!
Female Gamedev: *picks up the shovel and mutters darkly* Best move along, or you’re going to find out…
Here’s some message variants that I am done hearing from “allies”:
“Wow, there sure is a lot of crap…”
“Wow, don’t know how you put up with all this crap.”
“Wow, if I had to put up with all this crap, I would quit.”
“Wow, I sure am glad that I don’t have to deal with this crap.”
If you wake up one morning and see that someone has delivered a mountain of manure to your doorstep so high and deep that it keeps you from leaving the house…?
You have no choice but to deal with it.
No, it doesn’t matter whether you asked for the crap. It doesn’t matter whether you deserve the crap. It doesn’t matter whether you have better things to do than shovel crap.
THE CRAP IS IN YOUR WAY. If you want to get anywhere–to work, to the doctor’s office, to drop your kids off at school–you have to shovel that crap out of your way as quickly as possible.
And when you are bent over in your business suit, sweating as you shovel crap and cursing and weeping as it gets all over your work clothes, the absolute last thing you want to hear is your crap-free neighbor walking out the front door, looking over at your yard, and saying, “Wow, that sure is a lot of crap! I don’t know how you manage! I’d be late to work all the time if I had to deal with all that shite!”
Yes. Funny you should mention it!
You fucking would be late to work all the time. And you’d be late to everything else all the time. And you’d be arriving at work covered with crap all the time. Especially if your neighbors wouldn’t pick up a shovel and help you to clear up the mess.
In short, if you can’t be bothered to pick up a shovel and deal with the crap? Shut your pie-hole. It doesn’t matter whether the crap you see on your neighbor’s doorstep is sexism, racism, transphobia, ableism, whatever….announcing your privilege while you stand by and do nothing is not an endearing habit.